While the time at the theatre was meant to provide respite for my cousin, a particular storyline in the Dreamworks flick resonated with me – that of being uniquely gifted. In this “savoring” season of my life, it is so easy to reflect back and wonder if there is any true value in anything I’ve done. It’s easy to fall prey to the sins of “what if” and “if only.” While I don’t regret the road I’ve traveled, I do wonder how many years have been robbed because I have so often veered from the illuminated path and gotten tangled in the twisted limbs of things like hurt or ego or fear. And while I do believe God is sovereign, it’s that mysterious mix of His providence and my obedience that I have yet to fully grasp.
I look at my fingerprint. There is no one with this fingerprint in existence. While to the naked eye it may look strikingly like others, when examined in fine detail, it is truly one of a kind – evidence that God has uniquely created me for this time, this moment, this life. That fingerprint is a physical reminder that He has “formed and fashioned me,” and that I am truly “fearfully and wonderfully made.”
But do I really believe that? Do I really believe I am “one in a million”? Or do I believe I’m merely “one of a million” – that my unique design by an almighty God doesn’t really count for much in the big scheme of things? If “believe” means “by life,” then all too often I slap God in the face with my answer. What would my life look like if I truly lived out His perfect calling for me? How would I live if I took seriously His craftsmanship in every aspect of my being? Oh God, please forgive me for not taking seriously enough Your divine plan, Your wonderful creativity. Please help me to see You in even the smallest details. You are a mighty God who needs nothing, yet you create each one of us to uniquely reveal Your glory. Help me to see what it means to be “one in a million” in You.
“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.” – Martha Graham
Psalm 139:13-16 (The Message)
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.
One thought on “One of a Million, or One in a Million?”
I am going through the wondering of the same thing right now. What have I wasted? But I am not planning on staying in the wondering stage for long (at least that’s my plan – my personality often says the opposite though) – I am embarking on a “planning” journey where I make my plans for the 2nd half of my life through much prayer and seeking after God to see if these plans are His plans. I may find out His plans are completely different than my plans – but I am determined not going to waste the 2nd half of my life as I feel I have done the first half…