When Swears Aren’t Enough.

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There are some days when swears aren’t enough.

I stood in the shower, tears streaming down my face. The morning had already started off on a hard note, as I learned that a friend from my childhood had passed away. We first met when I was in middle school, when he and his brothers used to tease me as I tried to tan my pale skin in the backyard and I would respond with the rudest comments I could create about their anatomy. Both of us would grow up to find far better ways to treat people. He was only 55 – an amazing man who loved God and his family. And justlikethat, he was gone. With that ache freshly imprinted on my heart, I got the text.

“I don’t know if our marriage is salvageable.”

The long-time friends who had for years encouraged my husband and me to love each other well were now engaged in head-to-head conflict as their marriage crumbled under the weight of anger and deception. Covenant groaned like a tree limb on the verge of snapping in a storm.

And so I cried. And I screamed.

“I fucking HATE you, Satan. How dare you! Get your vicious hands OFF THIS FAMILY!”

Kill. Steal. Destroy. Those three words. Over and over again in my mind. The three words the enemy loves. The three words more vile than any swear could ever be.

And those words have been scribbled like graffiti on people all around me, defacing lives and relationships. Even the most upright, well-respected, always-have-their-heads-on-straight people are clinging to lies about what is good and what is noble and what is right. About who they are and what they are meant to be. I know it’s not a new thing; in Psalm 12, David calls it when he says

Quick, God, I need your helping hand!
The last decent person just went down,
All the friends I depended on gone.
Everyone talks in lie language… ~Psalm 12:1,2a

 

Ronne

Some days, the weight of it all doesn’t get to me. But some days, like today, I want to grab my friends and say, “Look me in the eye – what the hell is wrong with you? You are so much more than this.” I want to shake and keep shaking, yelling, “WAKE UP. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE WAKE UP.” For those who call themselves Christ-followers. For those who don’t. For all who desperately need God but continue to reach out to anything but Him – even when they know better.

Yes, there are some days when swears aren’t enough. And on those days, this girl shows her battle scars in dark circles and trembling voice. This girl yells and screams and keeps praying because DAMN IT ALL, she will not let the enemy destroy those she loves. This girl cries big old ugly tears and honestly would rather hide than let you see her this way because she’s not sweetness and light and lovely words (yes, she battles the scribbled graffiti too).

RRock

And this girl clings to this promise:

The suffering won’t last forever. It won’t be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ—eternal and glorious plans they are!—will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, He does. ~1 Peter 5:11

 

God is the final statement. The punctuation. The period. The exclamation point. The closing quote. No matter how many swears are written into the sentence of today, it ends with God.

God gets the last word. 

I cling to the last word.

:::

How do you deal with the days when the swears are not enough? 

This entry was posted in Musings and Thoughts and tagged , , , , , , by Ronne Rock. Bookmark the permalink.

About Ronne Rock

Ronne Rock’s heart finds its strongest beat where beauty and pain collide – because hope always finds us in the shattered places. There’s more than 30 years of marketing and communications experience in her bones, and she finds great joy in sharing leadership wisdom as a regular contributor to Orange Leaders and QARA. But more often than not these days, she's with the vulnerable in difficult places around the world, gathering stories that change stories. Find Ronne's words in "For You, Love" the prayer journal that invites you to respond, and in Everbloom, a collection of stories from the Redbud Writers Guild. She is currently writing, "Building Eden: Principles of a Grace-Filled Leadership that Restores and Redeems." 

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Comments

23 thoughts on “When Swears Aren’t Enough.”

  1. Raised in a Christian family, I was taught that certain words (swearing aka “cuss words”) were bad. They are a sin in the eyes of God. The Bible doesn’t say that. It does say that hating someone is the same as murder. Murder is a sin. Lusting after someone is the same as adultery . Adultery is a sin.

    So, though I don’t get the need to use certain words, I can understand the deep rooted sentiment behind it. The desire of our hearts – how we were created – longs to love and feel loved… and it longs to see the people around us feel His love as well.

    Thank God for your passion. I don’t think any of the disciples were perfect… far from it.. Some were fishermen… which I assume had language of sailors. 🙂 Jesus brought them out of their day to day and I don’t assume their language changed immediately…. their passion did, however.

    Thank you for your honesty. Some feel awkward in sharing, but it is honesty that will show our love for others more than any Pharisaical, hypocritical, “holier than thou” attitude ever can.

      1. There are moments when our humanness is not forgotten… on the contrary it is on display for all to see. As long as it doesn’t cause our brother/sister to stumble it could actually help others see that we’re all still human. That we aren’t perfect. That only highlights just how perfect God truly is.

  2. Amen and amen, R2. Once again, your transparency and gut-level honesty strikes a chord that far too many of us (me) lack the courage to voice. I share your anger, frustration, pain and near sense of futility in a fallen world. Note the intentional “near” sense of futility, because this visceral, vehemently vitriolic (sorry; too many years listening to Baptist sermons alive with alliteration) is NOT futile! YES we live in a fallen world and YES we are under attack by an enemy that seeks to kill, steal, destroy…but God has dominion over all things in heaven and on earth. And at the end of the day, no matter how much it seems that “the end” will never come, we rest surely, confidently and hopefully in the promise of His grace. And yes, He has the last word.

  3. God didn’t give you the name “Rock” by chance. It is your calling. Put your armor on piece by piece today and be ready to share your shield until your loved ones find the parts of their armor that have been misplaced. xO

    1. In my journal, I listed that armor piece by piece as I prayed to be equipped to go to battle on behalf of others. I love it so much that God whispered in your ear to tell me that list was no coincidence. Thank you! xoxo

  4. Thanks, Ronne. Needed to read this today. I still haven’t figured out how to deal with days when swears aren’t enough. I mope, I wallow in a soup of self pity, doubt and fear, and complain to God and how-could-he-let-this-happen. It’s so much easier to be an encourager for others than to be positive about myself and my situations… I know to run to God, to pray to Him and ask things in His name, to read the Word and be comforted by how it lives, but knowing and doing are different things when it all comes crashing down. Maybe the knowledge is better than nothing sometimes. I know this- thanksgiving and kindness and love drive out fear. When I can’t bear anything else, I can at least try to be these things.

  5. Your words, as always, are beautiful. Thank you, Ronne, for having the courage to hold on and let the Truth shine through you, even in the midst of great pain. Your strength to cling is inspirational to all of us who are right there, clinging along with you.

    So keep clinging, my dear…

  6. When swears are not enough – which is today – there is only one thing I can cry into the darkness – Maranatha. Come quickly Lord Jesus. Through the blinding tears and choking sobs, interceding on my face for the ones I love, a heart cry of Maranatha cuts through the darkness to the only true light. He is coming. And He has the last word. Thank you Jesus. Thank you, thank you, thank you that the darkness does not last forever.

  7. Satan is indeed a thief and a liar and comes to destroy. Instead of being on our “christian” high horses about bad language, we’re better off using that energy to fight the enemy and love our brothers and sisters. It’s OK to be that angry at Satan and what he does.

  8. holy. fucking. hallelujah.

    redemption. never let it be said that swearing decreases your intelligence, that it makes you appear to have a lesser vocabulary. sometimes it makes things wider, opens up the locked places.

    I love you, I love this. <3

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